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Would you call this love? Or is it only one sided attraction?

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asked Feb 2, 2016 in Questions by tsanju (280 points)
edited Feb 2, 2016 by prashant69
I was so close to girl from 8 months whom i had an interest for about two years. For that 8 months we messaged a lot about family, life, studies and personal life. We both are from same university. One day i asked out her. But she gave a negative response. It didn't affect us because we had the same "relationship" back again. Every person who hear our story or saw us thinks we are boyfriend and girlfriend. We messaged a lot. Even she sends lot of her pictures to me Even we met couple of times out side the university. I thought with time she will accept me.
But one day she told me that she is in love with another guy. I was really upset and i let her go. How ever i made up my my mind. But even after that she messaged me like "are you angry with me", "can i talk to you" So i talked to her. How ever she lost that person due to their personal issue. Problem is she still wants me to be the same old person. But still she gives me a negative answer. What should i do?



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4 Answers

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Dear sanju
As per my view you have to meet her and clear that you still love her and want to be gf bf, if she reject then leave her and do your study.  Let her face her life alone. If she have any feeling for you she will be come to you. Otherwise she will find her way.
Means prior to wasting of your valuable time and money behind her, you can utilise that in some where else. So be clear with her
answered Feb 2, 2016 by rohit.sharma786 (895 points)
selected Apr 27, 2016 by tsanju
commented Feb 4, 2016 by tsanju (280 points)
thanks rohit.sharma786 for your answer. Once she left me i made up my mind. But she is the one who is coming back to me. She wants me to be with her. Even when my replies are late and even when they are in one sentence she gets upset. Actually she is not letting me to go. But she is not understanding my love. Even one day i asked her why you always care about me. She said "Even i don't know why i always care about you". She once requested me not to leave as a friend. Thats why i still care about her and i believe both of us have a bond that we cant loose the other.But now i think i have to move on
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Why are you asking us?

I'm sorry, but this is a stupid question. The only way you're going to find out the answer is by talking to her yourself. What is it with guys that they cannot understand that girls can be friends with a man without wanting to have a sexual relationship with him. Not every guy that a girl talks to is going to be a special partner. She obviously values your friendship, but she has had the chance to take it beyond friendship, and didn't want to. If circumstances have changed, the only way you will know is by asking her. I suspect you will get the same negative response, but I could be wrong.

I will point one thing out to you: some of the most successful and happy marriages have come about because the two people started out as friends. Remember, you are friendly with her because you have things in common with each other, and she at least doesn't find you objectionable to look at. Knowing the way most guys are so visually orientated, she must be pretty, or have a great body, or something that attracts you to her. If you enjoy her company for her conversation as well as her looks, then even if you never become lovers, you will still have a good friend. But if friendship blossomed into romance, then you stand a better than average chance of having a happy marriage together.

They her friend, and bide your time. You can ask her how she feels, but don't try to push her into something. If and when she is ready, she will let you know.

Good luck

Salma
answered Feb 2, 2016 by sexysalma (14,920 points)
commented Feb 2, 2016 by Ankit cool (915 points)
I like the way of answer given by salma di. I agree with her. But yes di all the boys are not like that watching girl as sex object.Good one salma di.
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I am also Sorry but this is really a stupid question. You should go to her and ask her what you want and what she thinks about it.
answered Feb 2, 2016 by Ankit cool (915 points)
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One thing is clear that she does not see you as you are seeing her and there might be possibility that you are not boyfriend material for her. She wants you to be her friend and if you are not comfortable with the idea of being her friend then tell her clearly that you want this relationship to steps forward and give her time to feel on this.

Cut off all the contacts with her if she does not want you as a boyfriend and move on would be better for you. It might be painful for you to let off her but you are left with no option so accept the reality and retort in more practical conduct. Find a suitable partner and settle down with new partner. Do not waste your time for her as she has no feelings for you and does not recognize your presence. 

answered Feb 3, 2016 by alpesh kapdi (18,935 points)

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