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I have this Fantasy of making out with a Gay. Am I a Bi-sexual?

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asked Oct 5 in Questions by vikramsingh (120 points)
edited Oct 6 by longhands1

I'm a 30 years old married guy with a beautiful wife and a lovely kid. I have been straight all my life.

The other day, I was watching 'brokeback mountain' about two men who are gay due to circumstances and since then have been getting the fantasy to feel up a guy. I know this is weird as I have never felt like this before ever.

Now when I meet a guy, I inadvertently visualise being in bed with him. That too a very normal guy, who probably has no homosexual tendencies. I am very manly and nobody can make out that I sometimes have these feelings too. I have been very straight throughout and probably even despised Gays long time back.

A very Gay guy wouldn't even turn me on probably like the one that they show the movie characters.

It all feels like a fantasy but at times, I feel I should try it out. I don't look at my friend's that way, nor any guy in my contact and I don't even know Gays really..

I have a healthy sexual relationship with my wife and we do have regular sex and I love it too. But when she gives me a blowjob, I sometimes think how it would feel like taking a dick in my mouth and licking it all over. I'm not sure again if I really want to do it, so all this is pretty weird.

I feel at times if I meet a guy just like me, with a good job and a family and definitely not just a gay, but just somebody curious like me, who also has a secret desire to try it out with another man, I would want to probably try it with him.

But then I feel I shouln't screw up my happy life for something I don't even know about.

Should I really do it or just ignore this fantasy?

Can I be classified as a Bisexual?

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3 Answers

0 like 0 dislike
Fantasies don't make you gay. You love having sex with your wife. Is she satisfied or not.

If not then try to work on that. If giving blowjobs make you thinking of gay stuff then avoid it.

hope you understand. Need any help then ask.
answered Oct 5 by Harsh.03 (390 points)
commented Oct 6 by vikramsingh (120 points)
My wife is more than satisfied with me and I generally have a good appetite for sex.

It sometimes comes as a fantasy that I would love to feel a cock and suck on it when my wife does it on me.. but again this is just a fantasy.. I'm not sure i might actually like it in a real scenario.

My problem is, it crosses my mind quiet a lot sometimes to try this out.
0 like 0 dislike
Vikram,

None of us are born straight. While we may physically belong to one gender, mentally we all have some elements of the opposite sex within us. It is for this reason that women do watch Lesbian sex and men sometimes watch gay sex.

Often, this partial leaning gets emphasized at any stage in Life. This leads us to being Bi-sexual. An experience or a passion gets triggered (difficult to lay your finger on it) and then we begin to doubt our sexuality.   

Your Fantasy has deep and wide repercussions if you do give in to it. It is very difficult to make a woman understand. Her first reaction on finding out would be …you don’t love me anymore. Besides one encounter could lead to the next and this would destroy your Family that you have nurtured over the years.   

In your narration, you believe that “Gay” is written all over a guy. This need not be the case and Gays are just normal human guys. It is also possible that some Gays, could be Bi-sexual and flip both ways. Do you visualize being a Top or a Bottom? Or you have not even thought about it?

Have you ever had anal sex with your wife? I suggest that you convince her to try it with you. This will give you a feeling that you are penetrating an anus and may fulfil your fantasy to some extent.    

The problem with any fantasy is that it does not remain a fantasy for long and the mental lust keeps gnawing till it bears fruition.

I had written an Article on the subject of Bi-sexuality some time ago. Here is the link

http://www.askanjali.com/134140/how-to-know-if-youre-bisexual?show=134140#q134140
answered Oct 6 by longhands1 (69,910 points)
commented Oct 6 by vikramsingh (120 points)
Hi Longhands,

Thanks for the reply.

I don't know what kind of sex I want to do with a guy.. top or bottom or anything.

As of now I'm pretty sure I don't want to get penetrated, but I would probably like to try anal, which you are suggesting. I can even try with my wife to get a feel of it.

I very well know what all can get screwed up if I try to live up to this fantasy of mine.. which keeps me away from trying it out with any one.. but then there are moments when I want to do it and then there are moments when I feel relieved I haven't tried it out.. it's pretty complicated.

I don't get turned on by Gay Porn. But what interests me is the 2 men having sex together.

Can it be a situation that I want to try with someone and I end up disliking it altogether?
commented Oct 6 by longhands1 (69,910 points)
Vikram,

It is often better to live a Fantasy as it is. We often do not know whether we will be able to control the consequences.

If you have a strong will power, then I suggest you try it out once. Finding a suitable partner will be an onerous task. I had recently answered a User who wanted to know about Gay Spas. You can read up on that Answer.
commented Oct 9 by vikramsingh (120 points)
I didn't find it Longhands.

Thanks for the suggestion, but it's difficult to find a guy in a similar state like mine.

For instance, I don't want to do anal and stuff at all. I feel differently from a regular Gay.
commented Oct 9 by longhands1 (69,910 points)
Here is the Link to the earlier Post :

http://www.askanjali.com/138348/can-i-go-to-a-gay-spa-for-sex-is-it-safe?show=138348#q138348
0 like 0 dislike
It seems that you are not gay or even a bisexual but you are curious man who wants to know how it feels which is normal among many men so you are not alone here. You should not try to fulfill your desire to test something like this as in the first place you do not have a right to cheat on your wife just because you are curious about something.

I say stop analyzing things too much about the gay act and stop seeing those kinds of movies if it leaves you thinking on the act. Put all your effort into your wife and do new things in your sex life to spice up as I think you need to spice up your sex life with your wife. If the thoughts about gay scenes and acts come in your mind that let it come and go as with time you will be fine.
answered Oct 6 by alpesh kapdi (21,515 points)
commented Oct 9 by vikramsingh (120 points)
What you say makes sense..

Only I end up thinking about it at times. A gay man or even gay/lesbian porn doesn't turn me on at all..

I'm only curious to feel up a guy.. feel another penis. Also I know there's repercussions to this too.

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