Please Register and complete your Profile. Age is mandatory. You will enjoy being on this Site.
Welcome to AskAnjali.com India's No 1 Sexual Health Forum. Ask Anjali and other experts & members questions on Sex, Masturbation, Relationships, Love, Affairs, Penis and much more.
Want to listen to the voice of your HOT Anjali Aunty? Click on the "Audio Answers" menu link and listen to her answer all your sexual questions.

13,947 questions

44,825 answers

33,656 comments

63,375 users

The Ask Anjali Team

Sidebar

I am a Middle aged widow. Can I have sex with my young Boyfriend?

2.8K views
asked 3 days ago in Questions by Sreeja (120 points)
edited 2 days ago by longhands1

I am a 57 year old widow and living alone. Since last six months, I have a boy friend. He is 27 years old and very energetic.

Firstly, we are very good friends. Later, I came to know that he is very interested in sex. He talks occasionally about sexual subjects. He always talks sexully with me.

Few days ago, he told me that he wants to have sex with me. I am also interested in having sex with him. But my problem is my vagina. It is dry. My last fucking was about twenty years ago. Now, I fear it will cause painful intercourse. I have heard that there are some lubricants which will help to improve the vaginal dryness, but I do not use these products.

My doubt is: Do these lubricants help pain less intercourse and will they help me to reach orgasm? He is a young and strong boy and I am a 57 years old woman. Will his hard fucking cause any problems to my health?

(Picture is only representational)

Dear Member,

We are happy to welcome your Question on AA, the No. 1 Site for Sexual and Relationship Issue. We hope you will get many Answers. Please have the courtesy to “Thank” and give your comments to the Users who have taken the trouble to Reply.

Also,

1. Please complete your Profile if you have not done so. Go to My Account and update your details. Name is not mandatory, but age is compulsory. We will not approve a New Question if this is not done.

 2. Before you ask a new Question, please choose Best Answer for your earlier Question. Wait for 3-4 Answers before you select the Best Answer. If you do not do this, we will not approve your new Question.

3. Once a Question is approved, do not edit it again. If you want some changes, send me a PM (Personal Message).   

4. Do not reply to Old Posts, which are more than 6 months old. It is a waste of time.

5. Finally, do take the trouble to give Answers to questions asked by others. Your solution could shower you with the User's Blessings.

Moderator




Please log in or register to answer this question.

6 Answers

0 like 0 dislike
Sex would not be a problem at all so do not worry. For your dryness problem I would say you should use lubricates and that would not give you any adverse effect as those products are for sex and it would not give you any infections so relax.

You may feel pain because of not having sex for 20 years but that is bearable and you will start enjoying it soon and lubricates will reduce your pain up to the extent you will feel just pleasure so go for it. However, before having sex with him talk to him and let him know you want to take slow unless you feel comfortable and confidence in resuming your sex life.

If possible then start doing some intimate stuff with him and not proper sex and see how it goes like you both can cuddle, kiss, caressing each other, hand stuff, oral sex and other things that are sexual but not the penetrative sex and see whether you will retain your wetness or not. Your vagina is dry because there is no sexual activities for the last 20 years so naturally it will become dry over the period of time but once you restart sexual activities it will start getting wet.

There is nothing wrong in having sex with younger boy as it is your right to have sex and since you are widow there is no moral aspect which comes in the way. Make sure that you do not become emotionally dependent on him as this arrangement is not permanent one because whenever he finds his partner he will leave you so you have to be ready to have this relationship for shorter period of time. As long as he is available and you feel good having his company you can have sex with him all the time. Be confident and update us soon with your experience.
answered 3 days ago by alpesh kapdi (21,850 points)
0 like 0 dislike
Yes you can as far as lubricants are concerned they are made for this special purpose so there is not anything to worry just buy a good one and have sex.
answered 3 days ago by myselfarun (670 points)
0 like 0 dislike
Vaginal dryness after so many years is natural. It can be overcome by using olive oil or coconut oil in your sex organ.

Painful intercourse is likely to happen. You should have thought about it much earlier. Starved for long time, go ahead with boy friend. More matured married men might have a better choice. Bear the pain with clenched teeth, pain will be followed by heavenly pleasure.

How do you know he is energetic? Do you mean in sexual matter.
answered 3 days ago by Motilal (5,995 points)
0 like 0 dislike
I would like to clear some facts.
1) in modern days people who's age is from 30 to 50 years are called middle age people.
2) you said that your bf is energetic. but that doesn't confirm that he is energetic too when it comes to sexual performance..

now your are 57 years old and widow. lack of sex since last 20 hears something. so your doubts about vaginal dryness are correct. but haven't you got any wetness in those years.
a well forplay stimulation can make your vagina wet. you can use lubrication which are available in markets. they are good but sometimes cause some itching. but no allergies or reaction so far I heard.

as your 57 years old, so there is very very very less chance that you get pregnant. but I suggest to use condoms. condoms can help you from std hiv and pregnancy. plus condoms are little bit lubricated. so they can help you to overcome the dryness issue.

and this is my personal opinion and I hope you understand what Im writing here. -. as you are widow and 57 years old, you need someone to love you someone to take care of you.  you still got sexual desires which indicates loneliness in your life. your bf is 27 years old. soon he may find another girl so he may can leave you. so your relationship with any young guys won't last that long.
you can have sex with many guys as you want. it's all on you which things you give high priority.
answered 3 days ago by Harsh.03 (435 points)
0 like 0 dislike
Sreeja,

Who told you, that a woman's sex Life ends when she reaches menopause? These are myths created by Society in order to keep widows in check and under the rule of Elders.

You may not have had sex for the last 20 years, after you became a widow, but that does not mean you cannot have penetrative sex.

Yes, you are right that after menopause, the vagina does not lubricate as much as it did when you were younger, but then even some young women have this problem about dry vagina. Don't let that bother you. There are lots of products available at chemists, to lubricate the vagina. At you age, you should be confident to go and get them.

You have lots of things going for you. You have a young companion, who has shown his desire for having sex with you and you, yourself are not averse to the idea. So you can definitely go for it. You have not told us if you have grown up children.

Why do you fear that his love making will be painful? Seeing porn, give us this idea. That a man keeps pounding a woman's vagina. You could be surprised that once you start, you could become a tigress and want more and more. Honestly, just hugging and kissing or allowing him to suckle at your breasts will make you feel like a new woman.

You need not worry about condoms, if you are sure that your partner does not have other sex partners.

One word of caution though. You partner may want to break free at some stage. You should be prepared for that. Do not get emotionally attached to him. That would become messy.

Go for it.
answered 2 days ago by longhands1 (71,355 points)
commented 2 days ago by Affi4u (120 points)
Yes you have your own life
0 like 0 dislike
Yes you can definitely enjoy with him...As you are 57 there is no chance of getting pregnant after menopause  so no need to use any contraceptive methods...To overcome vaginal dryness you can use allovera gel or oil like coconut oil,mustard oil according to your choice.... With proper lubrication no problem in intercourse....Your vagina must be capacious enough to accommodate penis of a young man....So enjoy all kinds of foreplay and penetrative sex....All the best....
answered 2 days ago by Sexy Simpram (1,285 points)

Related questions

3 answers 2.1K views
6 answers 25.0K views
24,998 views asked Nov 24, 2012 in Questions by pragashr (520 points)
...