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My Mother was arrested in sex racket. How to deal with this situation?

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asked Dec 24, 2017 in Questions by santosh_panda (120 points)
edited Dec 29, 2017 by longhands1

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Hi,

I am Santosh, 26 years old, currently working in an IT company at Bangalore. I have only my mom. She is a widow and 52 years old. She was also working in a Govt. office in my Native city.

Last week, suddenly the Police called me in and said your mother is arrested. She is involved in sex racket. She is now in police station.

I was shocked. Immediately, I left for my native place. Now my mother is booked for 6 months but she got bail. She lost her job also and all our neighbours and Family know about this. No one is talking to us. I feel very embarrassed. I also came to know that my mother is involved in this Sex racket for last 2 years. She was doing sex mostly with college student in our home town.

One of our neighbours reported this in police station and the Police caught my mother redhanded.

My Mother and I are verry embarrassed. We have decided to leave my home town and move to Bangalore.

Kindly give some ideas how to deal with this situation.

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9 Answers

0 like 0 dislike
Your mother was part of the racket or she ran the racket too,  supplying girls or boys?

And let me correct you,  its only you who is embarrassed and not your mother. She's embarrassed cause she got caught and not for what she did.  If she was having an affair  it was understood but this is really pathetic.  

If I were you,  I would have cut all contacts with her at once.  She didn't even thought about you when she was doing all this,  did she?

And finally,  you're taking a big chance too.  Is there any guarantee that she won't do it again?  Imagine if your colleagues get to know about this anyhow.
answered Dec 24, 2017 by gr8gaur (1,810 points)
commented Dec 25, 2017 by santosh_panda (120 points)
Hi friend, thanks for advice. As per your questions she was only doing sex racket. No other girl was involved.

I don't what will happen in the future but I will try my best for my mother, to make her happy.
0 like 0 dislike
This is the best solution so it would be better sooner you leave the place and shift your living arrangement where no one knows about your guys. You cannot do anything now as all the things happened so give it time and everything will be fine.

It is useless for you to investigate why your mom started doing all this things and what made her do it. Just make sure that now your mom stay away from all this things and you take the charge of responsibility. Shit happens in the life but that does not mean we should lose the hope of good things happening in the life.

This is the bad time in your mom and yours life but time has the capacity to heal all the wounds.
answered Dec 24, 2017 by alpesh kapdi (22,630 points)
commented Dec 25, 2017 by guruofalldivas (270 points)
Absolutely agreed, there is no alternative to her doing. Son must unnecessarily go through more labors. Women must be looked after by father, brother and elder son's, the activities how did they go unnoticed...
commented Dec 25, 2017 by santosh_panda (120 points)
Yes dost we r now moving my mother also agree for this
0 like 0 dislike
Its better for you and your mother to leave and move on to new city as now it will be very difficult for you both to live there.
Also you should not ask questions to your mom about how all this happened. Give her time.

I think she has indulge in all this to support you and your daily needs.
answered Dec 24, 2017 by myselfarun (895 points)
commented Dec 25, 2017 by gr8gaur (1,810 points)
He mentioned he works in an IT firm,  and an IT firm provides enough for 2 to survive even if you're a fresher.
commented Dec 25, 2017 by santosh_panda (120 points)
Sure dost I mean not asking this question to my mother I just forgot this allthing
commented Dec 25, 2017 by myselfarun (895 points)
I too work in it and i know some it company which do not even pay for 1st 6 months if you are fresher.
commented Dec 27, 2017 by myselfarun (895 points)
Sure tough time for you bro
0 like 0 dislike
I want to elobrat in two ways for you to understand.you can follow as per your wish.

Sentinental/pathetic way:
she is your mom.she might have raised you and made you who you are now.she might do wrong in her past.but now ,she needs your help.you better give her sometime and everything will set right.we can't say at what situations she did like this?

Logical/practical way:
Your mom is 52 years old right? She is not any child who doesn't not what she is doing.it means she did it wantedly.you said she caught in a sex rocket,that too from 2 years.did she tell you this ?did she trapped girls ?.if it's the case , even prostitution is better than trap girls being a woman.it means there is a chance of her being wanted to be a part in sex racket.then no one should trust her.better leave her and to go somewhere.do you think people who approached her will leave her? Or will she leave,the money and enjoy that she got due to the sex racket.can you gurantee that she might listen to you ,after you even convenience her and take her  to a new place?if she is interested then, it's waste of everything.

You better talk to her and tell us what she says.we can't say what happened actually because we can't believe media too.there are some cases where media showing innocent boys as guilty because of some girls.

Hope iam not rude and this helps.

Thanking you
Coolcracker.
answered Dec 24, 2017 by Coolcracker420 (810 points)
commented Dec 25, 2017 by santosh_panda (120 points)
Hi friend,

My mother has not trapped any girl. She was only doing this thing like prostitution but I don't why she was doing this.

I love my mother. I can't leave her alone.
0 like 0 dislike
Santosh,

What happened was unfortunate. It would be easy to blame your Mom, for the mess she is in and for all the embarrassment she has caused you. I am not going to criticize. That would be easy to do.

Firstly, do not panic. Look for solutions. The first thing you have to do, is to find a good Lawyer who will argue your case in court. We all know how the Police can browbeat you and get a confession, even from innocent people. Since these episodes happened at your home, there would not be cam evidence to prove the case. Fight the case. The neighbours want to see your Family destroyed. Your mother can have any number of male friends. It is only when there is a profit motive, can prostitution be proved.

At what age, did you lose your father ie. at what age did your mother become a widow? Was she always working? Did financial hardship cause her to look for income from prostitution. Were you supportive of her financially?

Secondly, it is a wise decision to move from your home town. But if she is required to attend the police station, due to bail conditions or she has to attend court, then it may be difficult to travel often over long distance.

I am happy to see in your comments, your support for your mother. These are trying and sad times and you should stand by her. Presumably with her Family, ditching her, she has only you for support. If she stays with you, that would help.

We are all aware that Society (even at AA), are ready to throw stones at you. But how many of us can throw the first stone?
answered Dec 25, 2017 by longhands1 (75,160 points)
commented Dec 25, 2017 by santosh_panda (120 points)
Thanks for ur response my mother became widow at 44 age last 8 years back.she is very nice women I don't know the reason why she doing this think yes we have some financial problem.
For the court issue already court verdict 6 month jail with some fine my mother find guilty she accepted in court that she doing sex.
0 like 0 dislike
Hi Santosh,

My friend, I have a different opinion. You should have open communication with your mother. You know most of the problems can be solved by having open communication. If you had good communication then today you would not have had to face these kind of situations. Then you could have given better suggestions so that she could meet her physical need.

Reading your comments, I came to know that at some point you had financial problems. But you told that your mom had job, then why she did it? And if your mother needed sexual pleasure then she should have partner.

Today it may not be a problem but someday it will eat you away. It will keep ringing in your mind that " why she did that ?"... Better it is time to come clean, know your mother better, give her time to explain. It will bring you two closer. To understand your mother you don't need us.

Now giving the suggestions for current situations. Yes you need to move to different town, where no one knows your mother. Give a fresh start. Give her clear statement that she can't do this kind of things anymore.

"Kindly give some ideas how to deal with this situation" these questions can be dealt in two ways

A) how to deal this situation with mother--- if you runaway problem then it will never be easy between you two. Be her friend. Make an environment so that she feel free to share her feeling. It will mentally relax her. The days goes by it will become easy. So my suggestion is to face the problem don't run away.

B) how to deal with this situation with family, friends, neighbors--- it is tough. Moving to another city is one type of solutions but not permanent one. Only time can change the situation, but be ready for a lots of embarrassment from family, friends.

Have patience be strong.
answered Dec 25, 2017 by Kitkatray (320 points)
0 like 0 dislike
Hi Santosh,

It's a very painful time that you're going through. But have patience to face the problem and find the solution. Sex is not a crime, as a widow she must go for an affair to satisfy her sexual needs.

But making sex a business, it's a crime and she has done it. It will be better to go with the courts' verdict. After 6 month you can take her with you. But the problem is her sexual satisfaction. You can't do anything for it. She will do something for it.

But it's your duty to make sure that she won't go again for sex racket business. Hope I answered your question.
answered Dec 25, 2017 by dashing prava (420 points)
commented Dec 26, 2017 by santosh_panda (120 points)
Prava, I am trying to keep away my mother from this thing.
0 like 0 dislike
I am shocked to know about affairs of your mother.She shouldn't have done this.This incident has punctured your social status. You are not supposed to support your mother.Therefore,your decision to stay away from her is praiseworthy. Change of place is good alternative option.Fight for her if she is innocent and not involved in sex racket.
answered Dec 26, 2017 by Motilal (6,425 points)
0 like 0 dislike
Well, first thing you need to do is to move your mother from your native place to another place or city where every one is new to her.

Women/girls from good family do prostitution -
1) for money
2) for sexual satisfaction
3) both money and sexual satisfaction.

You haven't mentioned about your father. Is your mother a divorcee or widow? May be her sexual life was not that good with her husband, so after divorce/death of her husband she finds her space to full fill her sexual needs.

You can't undo whatever happened, but you can try to make things simple.
All you need to do is have a good communication with your mother about this topic. Try to find out why she did this and what she needs.

Hope you understand my point.
answered Dec 26, 2017 by Harsh.03 (540 points)
commented Dec 27, 2017 by santosh_panda (120 points)
Friend, my mother is widow since 2007. She told me that for sexual satisfaction, she started having sex, but then later, she charged money for this.
commented Dec 27, 2017 by Harsh.03 (540 points)
well this is my opinion and it's upto you, take it or leave it.

as you know well that your mother need  sex, so I asked her to stop doing this prostitute thing and have a sexual relationship with reliable person. right now she needs love and sex. so she can have sex at his place so you also can't get any trouble from your neighbours.

but thing is it's all depend on her if she wanted to have a sexual relationship or not. and don't force her for that.

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